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  • Writer's pictureAya

What’s behind ”I am not good enough”?

Updated: May 27, 2019

A client of mine told me that she had a hard time making new friends in the host country.

She has two children and both of them go to a local school but (she says) she doesn’t speak the local language well. She goes to a language school to learn the language but most of the students in her class are much younger than she is. Also, there are not many people who are from her home country in the area.

She said phrases like “I can’t do anything well” and “I am not useful/good enough”.

What is the biggest difficulty for you? The language? Cultural difference? Or are you telling yourself that it is too difficult for you?

If it is simply a language issue, you can focus on learning the language. If your main purpose of going to school is learning the language, you don’t need a friend there. You can find your own friend after finishing your study.

If you feel a cultural difference is challenging, you can research about the country and its culture. Maybe there is a community college or some learning facility to teach you local history, culture, and some other interesting topics.

However, if the biggest challenge is in your mind, which I believe is the case of my client, you have to work on yourself.

If you think “I can’t do anything well” and/or “I am not useful/good enough”, ask yourself

“How true is it?

Then ask more questions such as

>What makes you think you are not good enough?

>Are you happy with your thought? What do you feel about your idea?

>What action/inaction do you take?

>What is the result of your action/inaction?

Spend some time to see what is behind your thought and feeling.

We will work on this topic more!


If you are interested in talking about your expat life, concerns, challenges, and opportunities, please book a FREE session from here →

I would love to hear your story.




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